I recently moved to a new flat. After 3 months of travelling, coming back to a strange city and a strange house, seems to be overwhelming.The nice thing though, is my bed has a very nice view, where I can allow the nostalgia to go and wander as it wishes.
For 2 nights, a part of a series of countless nights, I feel as I do not exist.
Loneliness is a state of being. It can exist between hundreds of people, and it can get worse when its left to its own.I am getting used to it…my loyal companion.
I pick up my phone, expecting my close beings would remember to ask, how was the first night in your new place, how did you manage to get your things, hey, I miss you, or something that would sincerely show, a genuine touch of love and care. I find my linkedin notifications instead , and try to train myself on the disappointment. And I keep telling myself the same, dont expect anyone to check up, keep opening the phone to make sure you get used to it. But again, what did we say about expectations?
Is it that, the people who bring value to our life, are actually not, and we allow them to bring the value. Is it that, those we give importance to, start subconsciously falling into a comfort zone where they take us for granted. They take our care, our existence, words, and affection, all for granted.
The effect ,one lonely night can do to a human soul, can be for indefinite future days and nights. We ourselves dont know the impact of our own solitude on our wellbeing, until later in time, when we become bit too emotional, bit too tired, and bit traumatized, that we begin to figure out, what tiny fractures loneliness did to our souls.
People are running back and forth, work, going out, family, friends, so many things. And there is always room for one person to have frozen time, where they feel nothing, see nothing, do nothing.
Dont let a close person ask for a kind word, don’t let them ask for what is known to be needed. In religion, they tell you not to let the other person ask for what they need, they tell you to bring out the empathy and expect what the person is in need of, and give it, to avoid the embarrassment of asking. Why do we do that with money, but fail to do with emotion and communication. We should not wait for the people around us to ask for our attention,we should not wait till others fall apart to give them what they might be strongly in need of. Attention, follow up, simple messages, good mornings and good afternoons, simple words of endearment, little reminders that we care even within the busiest of our days, an invite for a coffee, or maybe a walk outside, a simple hey hope you are doing well lets talk when we are both free.
What is life, without these unseen postulates of human care,and what are we if we fail to give each other these things at the time they are needed.
Leaving you a nice picture of Prague with its expectedly continuously changing weather.